So, you have to admit, it is flattering when you hand your boss a letter of resignation, and all of a sudden the person who has not appreciated you, willfully not acknowledge your worth and value, and has kind of been the reason you felt like a piece of ca-ca for the last six month NOW is saying to you... "I want you to stay, and here's what I'm willing to do to get you to stay."
This, my friends, is called THE COUNTER OFFER.
Tempting as it may be, statistics show that most people who accept counter offers generally do not stay with that company for more than 1 year after accepting.
Some reasons to not accept may have already entered your head. You may be thinking, "Why did my boss not recognize my worth before he was at risk of losing me?" It's pretty much money in the bank that down the road, the same boss who has been an absolute jerk for the last 6 months will indeed remember that you were going to "break up" with him and either make your life miserable or do his best to give you the oust!
This is a solid thought to keep in your equation when facing a counter offer. BUT it's also important that you go even deeper with the reasons to accept or decline a counter offer. I am a candidate-centric recruiter, so I have to remind you of the road that led to the decision to exit your current work situation.
Write down the following questions , and I really challenge you to be brutally honest with yourself when answering them:
1) What series of events led you to the point that you felt you needed to make a change in your employment situation?
2) On a normal day at your work, how do you feel when you leave at the end of the day?
3) How do you feel when you are going into work?
4) Has your boss/employer kept their word?
5) Do you feel appreciated or devalued in regards to your work environment?
6) Here's a hard one: Are your growing and thriving or just surviving?
7) Are you under a glass ceiling at your work?
8) And finally, does your boss believe in you, or does s/he belittle you?
Once you've answered these questions, then revisit the counter offer from a logical approach. You need to be deaf to the flattery you feel in the moment of receiving a counter offer and remember what brought you to the place of deciding to make an employment change. You may write down these questions and determine that maybe you don't need to make the change. BUT If your answers gave you a clear picture of an atmosphere that left you feeling unappreciated, stunted, and like a cog in the boss's machine, then those feelings alone are reason to not go back into that dysfunctional work relationship.
Lets get real. Words, raises, and flattery somehow give off amnesia as to why we're needing to leave. Not unlike when you break up with someone who doesn't value you. You know, that person who consistently demonstrates they are self absorbed and always forgets your birthday! For some reason, momentary flattery makes us forget all of the valid reasons we need to make a change.
In conclusion, If you need to move on, Don't cripple yourself by accepting a counter offer. Don't devalue your worth by choosing to stay in an environment that has a track record of keeping you under a glass ceiling. Don't allow the feelings of momentary flattery give you amnesia.
Power to the people!
Shawna Frommelt
Sr. Technical Recruiter
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